Miraculous

So what does it take to get a miracle?

People all over the world are simultaneously praying for their own miracles. Perhaps a loved one was struck by a terminal illness, or they're experiencing the pain of abuse, or maybe they are so desperately wanting to see God that they cry out for the miraculous to happen, revealing His very existence.

Whatever the case may be, on the surface it seem that miracles are hard to come by. Over the past few weeks, the question of praying for the miraculous has plagued me. I've wanted to pray for a miracle but it's like a giant wall stands in my way. This wall is big; all-encompassing. And no matter how high up the ladder I climb, or how many obstacles I overcome, it only seems to elicit more and more questions.

What if it isn't God's will?
Why should I get a miracle and not someone else?
Is it ungrateful to wish for intercession?
What if the plans He has are different?
What if I'm praying for the wrong thing?
What if my faith isn't strong enough to warrant a miracle?
But scariest of all,

What if I pray but God doesn't answer? What happens to my faith then?

Now, I can give you all the "churchy" responses to each of these questions. I've been around long enough that if someone else came to me with these very same fears I could probably recite the answers in my sleep. But the fact of the matter is that knowing and believing are two different things. Do I know that God is capable of working miracles? My head would answer yes, but in my heart I still struggle with unbelief.

In Mark 9:14-29, a father brings his demon-possessed son to Jesus hoping for a miracle. He isn't sure that Jesus can heal his son. Others had tried, and others had failed. But maybe, just maybe...

The man says to Jesus, "If you can do anything, take pity on us and help us!"

The "if" of his statement is an affront to Jesus, and so, Jesus responds in critique of his unbelief. At this, the man decides to change his request.

"I do believe. Help me in my unbelief." And with that, Jesus heals the boy.

Later, the disciples asked Jesus why they couldn't drive out the demon and Jesus reminds them, "This kind cannot come out by anything but prayer."

With no guarantees, it seems that to pray is our only hope. We must release responsibility, release our controlled attempts at managing the future, and abandon ourselves over (doubt and all) to the power of a God that we cannot see, but who loves and heals. Ever with our best in mind. Ever with the greatest love we've ever experienced. And ever with the promise to walk beside us come what may.

Lord, help me in my unbelief.